I was born on the fateful day: Do you really want to know?

Too bad. I'm gonna tell you anyways...

First came the honey. My mommy and daddy were naked. They covered themselves with the honey. Then I told my parents how to conceive me, as they were too distracted by the honey. After a smiling sperm infiltrated an over-easy egg, that's when the real magic occured...

I set up my base of operations in my mother's womb, due to the ready food supply and cover of darkness. Through the miracle of mitosis, I quickly set to the reproduction of cells in my body. I grew. My brain swelled. So did...other parts. The first ever penile erection in a fetus belonged to me. But where to stick it?

Nineteen years later I came across what is commonly known as a woman. Her name was Kyra. She was hot. Damn hot. I knew what I must do...

I didn't bang her. I laid her down, and made love to her. I made her my wife. We had some brats. One of them died while trying to climb a tree. His head was bitten off by a rabid raccoon that was living in the tree. Other than that, it was a pretty happy ending...

I take picture of stuff and color 'em real pretty

Playing games, sleeping, dreaming about playing games, thinking about sleeping while playing games, playing games while sleeping, playing games while sleeping and dreaming about playing games in said sleep. Sex. Food. Movies. Carpentry. So Jesus, So Boss, and SOOOO Bitchin'!!!